ok, i'm really upset, actually. or sad, rather. i know i look young and irresponsible but i'm not an idiot, dammit. i don't think i'm the youngest person in our department but i certainly look like the youngest one. i also teach less than the other new hires because i'm also rewriting a curriculum and intensively learning about the writing centre, but i guess it looks like i'm a joke. or it looks like i've been hired to fill some quotas. i'm a good one, that's for sure, i fill 3 quotas: woman, disabled, and international faculy. great.
so anyway, the problem started a long time ago but it really hit me yesterday. i'm the member of a committee but obviously, my opinion doesn't count and i am not expected to do any work. the other member of this committee has 1) worked on the projet on his own without telling me and presented the results to our department chair, and 2) complained to our chair that he couldn't do all the work alone and needed a third committee member, even though i've tried to talk to him several times, i told him when i was free to meet and that he should just tell me when the time was good for him, and i sent him some ideas to which he never responded.
and then again this morning. i am the member of another committee, and i said i would compile responses to a questionnaire that was sent to everyone and bring the responses to our next meeting. so i compiled the responses i got and made copies for everyone to bring at our next meeting. then on friday i wrote to the chair of the committee and said "could you send a reminder email to our faculty, because some people haven't responded yet" and she replied "oh don't worry, we won't need the responses at our next meeting (???), i'll send a reminder email again in a few weeks." and this morning, i got an email from her asking me for MY responses to the questionnaire, and she tells me that she has been gathering the responses too, and will be presenting the preliminary results at our meeting today!! WTF?? i am not lying or exagerating, i have printed both her emails. this makes NO SENSE!
i feel cheated and pissed off. and very very scared! something is very wrong, either with me or with this department. and i am not sure what i should do about it.
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2 commentaires:
Maybe something's wrong but it's certainely not about you, oh no.
Kiss & hug
I wonder whether it is typical having new hires serve on committees. I never did that, and so avoided possible misunderstandings rising from my ignorance about different things and the department politics. Now I serve on two committees, and have been told by some senior colleagues in private that I should not speak much at committee meetings. Just do what other senior people ask me to do. It is surely a learning process.
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